Anyway, I think I was hoping that a girlfriend would offer the kind of stability that I was looking for. I wasn’t looking to settle down, or get overly committed but just to have some companionship and someone who I could talk to about anything and everything. My (ex)girlfriend and I could do that, we talked about a lot of stuff, some of it was just pure rubbish and the rest of it wasn’t. I miss that. The ability to talk about crap with someone who will talk crap back, but know when to be serious and honest. I was probably looking for too much in my last relationship, trying to find something that wasn’t there but could’ve.

So I need to do some more thinking before I know how to move on and how to deal with the lack of stability in my life. In some ways I just want to ignore it, but I know that won’t make me happy. If I look inside myself a bit more then I might just be able to figure it out a bit more and find what I really need. And that might just be an email.

Who knows?